Surrogate Partner Therapy
Do you long for a healthy intimate relationship?
Or do you struggle to build relationships at all?
Maybe you’ve noticed an unhealthy pattern in your relationships and want to understand how to break the cycle.
Maybe you have questions you don’t know how to ask.
You are not alone.
These challenges are not new.
And surrogate partner therapy can help.
Surrogate partner therapy (SPT) helps individuals overcome obstacles to physical and emotional intimacy.
SPT is a three-way collaboration between client, therapist, and surrogate partner. In talk therapy, the client and therapist identify challenges to intimacy and which of those challenges would benefit from collaboration with a surrogate partner.
Through practicing healthy relationship dynamics with the surrogate partner, the client develops self-awareness and communication skills while addressing trauma, shame, or anxiety around intimacy. In collaboration with the therapist, the surrogate partner offers holistic relationship modeling that supports the client’s therapeutic process.
Many people find surrogate partner therapy while grappling with an overt obstacle to intimacy, such as
past abuse or assault
a physical disability
genital pain
life change, grief, or loss
body changes
culture-based shame around intimacy
limited (or no) sexual/dating experience or "late-life virginity"
a history of addiction
questions around gender identity or orientation
Other obstacles to intimacy can seem small in isolated incidents, but over time they become overwhelming.
For example, maybe you
have a hard time setting healthy boundaries.
find it difficult (or impossible) to ask for what you want.
feel so anxious about relationships, physical intimacy, or dating that you don’t want to try anymore.
As a surrogate partner, I join you inside of a relationship as you work to overcome these obstacles. Together, we’ll slowly build trust, practice healthy relationship dynamics, experience touch, and learn how to communicate with each other.
Already in an intimate relationship? Consider intimacy coaching.
